Built from Love, Destined by Faith.

Months it had been. By months I meant about 4.

I haven’t been able to blog for I don’t know what reasons.

Wait. I know the reasons.

It had been very busy for me.

School.

Planned to join contests.

Ran for Treasurer in Debate and Drama Society.

First, school. Since my last blog was about Preliminary Exams I think I should start everything happened after that.

As per usual schooling was as hard. Just. Being in a vacation at the moment is a relief even for 2 months really. I could never ask for more.

My deepest gratitude to my parents, family, friends and loveones for having to support me all the way. Believe me I need that much effort when I study.

Things got pretty harder. Fortunately I passed every subject and I was really really happy. Efforts paid off. As of my always concern, I never wanted to disappoint my parents. I could take disappointing myself but never them.

My birthday passed and I learned a whole lot for the past few months. Really. A whole lot. I just couldn’t imagine how I’ve grown up when I thought I had already enough. Very, wrong.

I still do things even though I know it shouldn’t haad been done.

What is wrong with me.

A human being can’t stop being so giddy when they’re happy. Those were the things I never wanted to end. I want to do exactly everything I wanted. Of course I am informed I just can’t.

I got accepted as Treasurer in our society. \o/ Having to be one of the leaders is something to be serious about. I had been a leader during elementary and high school but having to be an officer in college is a whole lot different. You just couldn’t be satisfied enough with what’s happening. You should be dedicated and have the very passion to help. I want to help my society for a whole lot reasons. I wanted to be a part of something amazing and at the same time hopefully having to be a help of making it better. I have extraordinary co-officers with me and I learned to love them as time passed by having to spent it together. They’re precious and I’ve been happy to encounter different personalities. My fully duties haven’t started as of yet but I know it would be hard. But I like challenges. I know it would make me bolder. I would really be more serious and disciplined. I believe we could improve our society and build a family. In doing what we love, we also build something lovelier.

About the contests. I’ve been covering Miss A’s Suzy. We are a team of 4. Roanne was Min but now it’s Mina. Airah as Jia and Tin as Fei.

Again it’s something I really love to do. I like dancing though I’m not a pro. But it’s like more of portraying them. It’s a cosplay and that we are in need to bring out the most of what they are and what they do at the same time not forgetting being ourselves also. It’s like showing how much you love the character. I really love Miss A as well as my friends. We do things we never tried and it’s such a great experience for us. These make us happy. Having to touch people is even a happier feeling. It’s not being liked perse but being appreciated for doing what you love.

It’s a huge pleasure for me to be happy in everything I do even though it would take too much effort and time. I got nothing to lose.

We haven’t won a thing but hey what’s important is that we won people’s hearts. Such. A. Great. Feeling.

I would really encourage everyone to pursue what they love. Never mind what would others say about you. You wouldn’t gain anything from them but hate. We have too much hate surrounding us to even accept one.

Be proud of what you are and what you love.

The hardest exam I have ever taken in my life so far.

Exam week started. But srsly though I feel every week is exam week in UST.

Anyway, I had 3 exams earlier today. Discrete Math started 8:30-9:30 AM. Good thing I decided to take a peek at TYK and fortunately I was one of the first people to fall in line to pay for the prelims so I was extra early before Discrete.

Discrete Math. I didn’t know most because for reasons some weren’t in the powerpoints for me to review. We’ve been dealing with powerpoints as sources for studying so I believed I couldn’t find some that we haven’t studied. I. WAS. WRONG.

For reasons I can’t blame anyone. Things like this are supposed to be expected. It’s just that it’s so frustrating and disappointing, don’t you think. I studied so hard for every exam. But having to deal which I haven’t gotten a chance to know was.. I don’t know.

Next, came Probability.

Iba ang hindi nag-aral sa mahirap talaga ang exam. Siguro masaya na’ko kung makaka-10 points ako dun. Seryoso lang. Kakaiba talaga. This what was I talking about sa title. I don’t want to elaborate any further basta sobrang nakakadepress lang kasi. Dahil sobrang dame kong inilaan na oras sa pagaaral tapos yung feeling na wala kang masasagutan. Nagkulang pa rin siguro ako. Kahit pigang piga na’ko. Kulang pa rin pala. Should have known.

Last exam for the day, Algorithms Lecture.

This was good. Everything was okay. I know most of the answers and I finished early enough. Though I haven’t answered the Heap Sort for reasons my mind was tired enough that it might just explode. Though it amounts to 5 points. You can have it I can not want it.

Good thing about tomorrow is that I don’t have an exam. Though on Wednesday I have to Friday. I’ll tell you more about it but I really hope I would be giving you guys good news because I really study for every exam I just don’t know what has been happening or it’s just me.

I don’t waste any of your money, sweat and hardwork. I really work as hard as I can. I promise not to disappoint anyone for I have no room and they don’t deserve it in any way. Still, working harder would be a great thing and being positive as always.

First post. 2012.

I haven’t told you what happened.

Christmas.

Christmas was awesome. Simple but wonderful. I was with my relatives. There was gift giving and a lot of food. My typical Christmas. Always sharing love.

I had been busy at the same time studying. I know. It was a vacation, after all. Or should I say they had given us more time completing our tasks. It had been always the usual. Though I wasn’t really going out like what I used before.

New Year. Welcome, 2012.

First week of celebrating new year is a blast. I hope it goes smoothly.

I saw Hyukjae, Kyuhyun and Siwon, blog. YES. Three of the people I cherish. It was difficult to actually see them. But it was worth it I wouldn’t change anything back what happened except my shoes.

They were just flawless. And I never expected Kyuhyun to be extra gorgeous. -____- I just love those guys, okay. You guys have your Tetris I have my Super Junior. Done. Deal.

Today’s Friday and a week of being back to school feels exactly like being back.

No more fooling around. Though I never intend trying anyway. But you know what I mean.

Let’s start this with a blast and have our responsibilities in their proper ways.

I am very grateful with God, my family and friends. I’ve been very blessed.

So far exams are good job except in Integral. I would put extra effort in studying, I promise.

That very moment when we actually accidentally meet is when usually I hope time can spare me its all or maybe even just for a while. That it could give me that very rare chance to hold you in my arms without any hesitations and fear, trace your smooth lips, look into your busy and tired eyes, hoping that after all these you would still have a good day ahead because you just made mine one of the precious days to date.

I am fucking pissed.

I know how much you know how it feels like. But you wouldn’t dare helping me. You are oblige to do this yet you won’t do it. Just because you’re fucking tired already and that nothing could make that ass move at the moment. You know what, I don’t hate you okay. I just hate that attitude. And this is a serious matter. I know I am not all mighty and responsible enough myself but bitch this is just unacceptable. And this other bitch. These attitudes you guys have. It makes me want to hate life though I couldn’t get myself hate people in it. And that what makes me hate myself. I have a pride, either. Though you guys won’t mind even any of it. Like, oh she fucking has pride like for all I care I’m just gonna continue whatever it is that I’m doing because this is more comfortable than doing what I’m oblige to do. Fuck it. FUCK IT. FUCK EVERYTHING AT THE MOMENT. If only I have what we needed. If. fucking. only. We won’t be like this believe me. I won’t be selfish. I would be fucking considerate all the way. I would fucking give you guys everything that you deserve. I can’t wait to graduate. I know this is not about this matter anymore but I just fucking would want to earn something I worked hard for. I don’t blame anyone. I don’t blame anything. I just couldn’t accept this. We deserve far better than this.